


The Hidden Rose

by JamieBluewind



Series: The Hidden Rose Series [2]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Anxiety, M/M, Negative Body Image, Panic Attacks, Self-Esteem Issues, Vomiting, cursing, teen rating
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-27
Updated: 2018-07-24
Packaged: 2019-05-29 06:32:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 9,670
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15067241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JamieBluewind/pseuds/JamieBluewind
Summary: Roman will be okay. He can handle the self loathing building up inside of him. He can ignore the weight pressing down on his shoulders as he plasters on a convincing fake smile. He can hide his pain from the others. He'll be okay... until he's not.





	1. Chapter 1: A Meeting of the Minds

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Roman's perspective
> 
> Chapter Warnings: self esteem issues, negative self talk and other cognitive distortions, and intimidation. (please comment if I missed any)
> 
> If you haven't yet, please read The Hidden Rose: Prologue which takes place before this story.

Roman had seen the polls. The fans hated him. They were right of course, but he would continue to smile and pretend. He was good at that. Nobody would know how hard it was to keep himself together as he suggested one sub-par video after the next that fans would only like out of habit. At least Joan was there to do damage control and make sure some of the videos were at least decent.

He swallowed down another wave of self loathing. Some of it slipped past him and made it to Thomas, but Roman took on the brunt of it. It was his job to make sure Thomas had a healthy ego on top of his other duties. The past few months had been worse than normal, but he could handle a little extra weight on his shoulders and the ache that had recently settled in his chest. It was for Thomas after all.

Roman took a deep breath and sunk down. He was going to be late to the meeting, but the others wouldn't mind. It had become such a common occurrence that Logan didn't even bother lecturing him anymore. Once upon a time, he had enjoyed the exchanging of ideas and witty banter. Now, they left him mentally and physically drained. Still, he had his part to play.

\---

Roman rose up with his body already in his signature pose. “Greetings my colorful comrades!” he said with a wide smile as his eyes adjusted to the neutral common room. It was similar to Thomas' home, only with the furniture moved around to accommodate a large kitchen table with color-coded chairs for each of them.

“Hey there kiddo!” Patton said. He was smiling brightly from the kitten. He had somehow gotten a bit of flour on his right cheek. “Don't forget to grab a treat before we start.” Patton winked and grabbed a couple cookies from a bright blue plate on the counter before he started towards the table.

“Don't mind if I do padre,” Roman replied as he headed towards the kitchen. “And might I say that your cooking makes the room smell heavenly.” Logan hissed out a breath through his teeth. Roman chose to ignore it.

Roman looked over the cookies with a warm smile. Chocolate chip cookies, thumbprint cookies made with their favorite jelly, and last but not least, raisin oatmeal cookies. The first two had been staples for every meeting, but the third was a more recent edition. Patton had taken Roman's statement against raisin oatmeal cookies as a challenge and had started including them a few months after the incident. The golden raisins were sweet and full of flavor without being cloying. The cinnamon, vanilla, brown sugar, and oats were in perfect balance. They were quickly becoming Roman's favorite. He bit into one with a hum as he wrapped a few in a napkin to put in his breast pocket for later. He then grabbed a plate and piled it high with a mixture of the remaining cookies for the group.

As he turned with cookie plate in hand, Roman's smile faltered. Most meetings only involved Virgil, Logan, Patton, and himself which left the other four chairs vacant. Today however, there was one extra side at their meeting. Roman felt his blood boil.

“What's lemony dimwit doing here?” Roman said in a huff. Deceit cast a sideways glance at Roman before turning his attention back to Logan.

“Thomas has been invited to a surprise party,” Logan replied. He sat straight in his indigo chair. His fingers were laced in front of him on the table. The agitation he was feeling leaked into every word. “As the probability of speaking to the person in question before the party is high, we must prepare Thomas by both determining an appropriate gift and by creating a plan on how best to omit facts and communicate a convincing falsehood should the situation require one. Deceit is therefore required for this as we do not want Thomas to...” Logan hesitated. He reached for a handful of index cards nearby and quickly flipped through them. “spill the beans. Honestly, I swear you read the title of a memo and just ignore the rest.” he stated with a flip of his left wrist. Patton was looking away while rubbing the side of his left arm with his right hand. Virgil just looked pissed.

Roman sat down the plate of cookies a little harder than needed before taking his seat. As Logan began reviewing the minutes from the previous meeting, Roman took a moment to try and release the tension building inside of him. It was a little harder than normal with the added weight.

Roman reached for another cookie and caught a quick smile come to Virgil's face before he covered it with his hand and turned away. Virgil seemed tense and on edge for more reasons than just the party. The reason was currently rubbing his gloved hands together. Roman hated seeing him like this.

Ignoring decorum, Roman grabbed a cookie and stood. Gripping the back of his vivid red chair with his free hand, he moved it to the end of the table. Now instead of sitting face to face with a pissed of Logan, he was sitting beside Virgil who was staring with a look of confusion and curiosity. It was definitely and improvement.

“I believe I require your assistance,” Roman said softly with a smile. Thankfully Logan didn't notice or didn't care.

Virgil raised his eyebrows. “Am I gonna regret asking with what?” he replied with a whisper.

“It depends on how attached you are to your clothes not fitting,” Roman said with a wink. “You see,” he said as he offered Virgil the raisin oatmeal cookie, “if nobody assists me in eating Patton's divine concoction, I will be forced to eat them all myself.”

Virgil looked down at the cookie and smiled. “I thought you said nobody would want a raisin oatmeal cookie,” he replied.

Roman reached out to the plate and grabbed another raisin oatmeal cookie before turning back to Virgil. “That was before I knew that they had the potential to be something this fantastic,” he said. “They are quite frankly becoming my favorite.” To emphasize his point, Roman took a bite of the soft cookie.

Virgil's smile brightened. Some of the tension in his body seemed to melt away. His eyes darted between Roman and the cookie in his hand before he closed his eyes and took a bite. His eyes went wide. “Oh my god,” he said mumbling through a mouthful of cookie. “They really are good.” He studied the cookie before looking back up at Roman. “I... I haven't actually had any since Patton let me try some of his test batch,” he said as he rubbed the back of his neck.

“Roman!” Logan snapped making both Roman and Virgil jump.

“You bellowed,” Roman said, dripping with sarcasm.

“Do you agree with Deceit's proposal?” Logan asked, ignoring the jab. After seeing Roman's clueless expression, Logan sighed and continued. “He suggested that Thomas use lies of omission as much as possible with the excuse that he needs to work on a video. The exception is if he is needed to distract them during the preparation time, which will result in Thomas suggesting various entertaining activities to take up the necessary window of time. You of course would be the best suited at suggesting appropriate activities.”

The genuine smile on Roman's face was quickly replaced by his well rehearsed facsimile. “It sounds like a solid plan,” he replied. “The distraction would have to be something entertaining, but not so fantastic to take away from the party...” he tapped his chin. “Perhaps their favorite pizza at Thomas' followed by a movie or a play?”

Logan nodded and made a note. “That is an adequate suggestion,” he said. “Now, on to the next topic.”

“Presents!” Patton interjected with enthusiasm as he raised both arms in the air. Without skipping a beat, he started listing off ideas as his gestured his arms and hands with all the excitement of a child on Christmas morning. Logan pulled out his spare notepad and started writing at a frantic pace to keep up with the energetic father figure, marking each suggestion with a score on how reasonable and relevant it was.

The others sat back and watched, fully aware of the routine. Roman looked to his side to see Virgil staring at him. It took him a moment to realize why Virgil looked so worried. By now, Roman should have jumped in with a crazy idea of his own. Instead, he was just sitting there watching it happen.

Roman shrugged. Virgil looked away, but continued tapping his finger together for the rest of the meeting.

\---

Virgil sunk out as soon as the meeting was over, followed by Logan. Patton went into the kitchen to clean up and store the leftovers. Roman watched him fondly as he tried to figure out what song Patton was humming as he worked.

He stood and went to put his chair back in its proper place when he came face to face with Deceit. Roman glared at him, but he didn't seem phased.

“You are terrible at lying,” Deceit said looking up at the taller side. “Everybody but me can tell.” Roman opened his mouth to retort, but was cut off by Deceit. “I can't already see the toll it's having on you. If you keep doing this... it's going to end very well for you and everyone else.”

As Deceit sunk out, he locked eyes with Roman. “Below all else, I'm Thomas' self preservation. I will hesitate coming after one of my own.”

Roman felt his skin crawl. Patton still whistled happily in the kitchen behind him. Deceit must have hidden their conversation from him.

Roman suppressed the shiver that ran down his spine and squared his shoulders. He pushed his chair back in place and gave Patton a smile and a nod before sinking down. He had more important things to do today than worry about the backwards buffoon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thank you to my wonderful beta reader Sarah. You rock girl!
> 
> And thank you to my readers. Every kudos and comment means the world to me.
> 
> I also have a Tumblr, so if anybody would like to message me or read the chapters on there, you can find me @jamiebluewind


	2. Chapter 2: Raindrops on Roses

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Roman's perspective 
> 
> Chapter Warnings: extreme self esteem issues, extreme negative self talk and other cognitive distortions, and negative body image (please comment if I missed any)

Roman opened his eyes. It was a brand new day filled with lots of opportunities to disappoint everyone. Another day of being ignored as he pumped out terrible ideas that nobody would like. Another day closer to everybody realizing how useless he was.

He rubbed his eyes. The movement took more effort than it should have. He rolled out of bed with a grunt. His body ached.

He avoided his bedroom vanity today. He already knew he was a wreck. He didn't need a mirror to tell him that. For a moment, he entertained the idea of throwing a sheet over the blasted thing, but decided it was easier to just ignore it.

He took off his pajamas and tossed them in the hamper before turning on the shower. He stood silent and still under the warm water for a long time. It beat against his skin, but it gave him no relief for his aching muscles.

He reached for the body wash and started to scrub. The bathroom filled with the smell of roses and sandalwood, but the foam didn't help his skin. Roman wondered how much time he could save every morning if he just got ready by snapping his fingers.

Roman turned off the water and stepped out. He left a trail of water in his wake as he went to grab his forgotten towel. A humorless chuckle escaped his lips as he held the towel in his hands. He could have snapped his fingers and had a fresh towel waiting or he could have just instantly made himself dry. He tightened his grip. “Leave it to me to come up with the least creative solution,” he said as he shook his head.

He methodically dried off, but his hand stilled at his left hip. The stained glass rose that was etched into his skin contrasted the skin around it. His towel slipped out of his grip and fell to the floor as he bit back a sob. His thumb ran across the tattoo like it had countless times before. He used to think that maybe one day he would find a special someone. That against all odds, someone out there could love him that he could love in return. But now he knew the truth. His hope had been a fairy tale. Nobody could ever love someone like him. He would die only ever knowing love second hand through his link to Thomas.

He closed his eyes and snapped his fingers. He opened them to his perfect hair. Perfect costume. Perfect character.

The room was still filled with steam from the shower and almost took on a gray tint to his tired eyes. With a flick of his wrist, it was gone. He left before the mirror cleared, not wanting to see his reflection. His concealer sat untouched by the sink.

He walked out of bathroom and got into character. His lips turned up to form a cocky smile. He stood tall and proud... at least on the surface.

He took a deep breath and sighed. He was determined to stay in his room if he could help it, but at least he was in character enough to fool someone if they stopped by for a minute or two. He didn't think he could hold it for much longer than that.

He shook his head. He was the fanciful side and he couldn't even play pretend. Pathetic.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thank you to my wonderful beta reader Sarah. You rock girl!
> 
> And thank you to my readers. Every kudos and comment means the world to me.
> 
> I also have a Tumblr, so if anybody would like to message me or read the chapters on there, you can find me @jamiebluewind
> 
> Fun Fact: The title of this chapter is from the song My Favorite Things from The Sound of Music.


	3. Chapter 3: The Vigilant, The Active, The Brave

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Virgil's perspective
> 
> Chapter Warnings: anxiety, mild panic attack, cursing (please comment if I missed any)

Virgil didn't know what was off, but something was off. He did his best to keep the feeling from impacting Thomas. He stayed on top of his breathing exercises. He listened to music while scrolling through Tumblr. He made sure to eat and sleep regularly. Nothing helped. He could still feel something humming through his being saying that he needed to keep his guard up. That Thomas was in danger.

When a feeling of dread hit him so hard it nearly took his breath away, he started looking for a source. At first, he assumed it was Deceit, but after trailing him for two days he ruled him out. Then he checked and double checked everything going on in Thomas' life before checking on his friends and family. After sifting through all the data, the only thing he found was that Thomas had been a little unproductive lately and Joan forgot their jacket last week.

Running out of ideas, he pulled up their version of YouTube which contained every video Thomas had ever watched. He filtered to show only videos Thomas himself was in and that were under six months old before settling in. There was always a chance that the source of his dread had been caught on camera. He tried to listen in on most of the videos, but there was a chance that he missed something. If not, there were worse ways to spend a day.

The minutes ticked by. Virgil found that he was really enjoying himself. It was fun seeing everything from a new perspective. Thomas seemed fine for the most part. Patton had his smile back. Logan seemed better than normal... if a bit more sticky. And Roman was... Roman was...

“Wait,” Virgil whispered to himself as he skipped backward ten seconds at a time. He furrowed his brows and chewed on the corner of his nail as he stared at the prince. Something about the way Roman moved was wrong and his eyes didn't hold their normal fire. Virgil had noticed something similar in their last meeting, but shrugged it off. He thought Roman was having an off day.

The video went on. Roman got worse. Virgil slowed the speed, but the camera didn't lie. The something that was off was Roman and whatever was going on was serious.

\---

Virgil wracked his brain for how Roman looked the last time he saw him. Had it really been three weeks? “Shit,” Virgil hissed. A lot can go wrong in three weeks.

Virgil sunk down into the commons and called for Roman, but nothing happened. He focused on where Roman's room would be housed inside Thomas' mind, but he couldn't feel anything. Panicking, he sunk down again and appeared in Thomas' house.

“Thomas!” he screamed. He scanned the room. It was dark and he couldn't hear a TV meaning Thomas had to be in bed. He turned to run up the stairs only to be blocked by an invisible force. He beat against it as his heart pounded in his chest.

An idea popped in his head. He morphed into Talyn and held out his hand. It passed through. “Damn reality column,” Virgil muttered as he climbed the stairs. He held onto his pants to keep them from falling off his much smaller frame.

Virgil turned the doorknob leading into Thomas' bedroom and threw open the door. He was greeted by a screaming Thomas who fell off his bed with a thump. The headphone jack jerked out of his discarded laptop causing the familiar sounds of The Office to fill the room. “Thomas!” Virgil screamed. It came out softer and higher than what he was used to.

“Talyn?!?” Thomas replied in shock. “WHAT THE HELL!?!”

Virgil held up a finger. “First off, not Talyn,” he said before holding up another finger. “Second, call Roman.”

Thomas squinted his eyes. “Virgil?” he asked, somehow even more confused than before.

Virgil took a deep breath and tried to calm himself while releasing just enough anxiety to trigger the adrenaline Thomas needed to focus. “Yes,” he answered. “I had to change into Talyn to get up here. Something is wrong with Roman and I can't reach him. I need your help.”

Thomas blinked rapidly before nodding. “We should head downstairs so I can call Patton and Logan too. They might be able to help.”

\---

The two made their way downstairs. Virgil took his place at his regular spot and reverted back to his normal form. He breathed in and started counting. Whatever was going on, Roman and Thomas needed Virgil as calm as possible.

Thomas turned on the lights and walked to the center of the room. “Logan? Patton?” Thomas called. The two sides in question popped up. Logan stood in a unicorn onesie holding a cup of tea. Patton stood in a cat onesie with a coloring book in his left hand and a blue crayon in his right.

“Little late to be shooting a video, hey kiddo?” Patton said with a smile. He somehow still gave off a fatherly aura despite his wardrobe.

“Agreed,” Logan stated now having dispersed of the cup and changed into his normal attire. “This is highly unusual behavior.”

“It's not for a video guys,” Thomas said looking solemn. “Virgil informed me that he can't reach Roman, so I brought you guys here just in case something is wrong. Have either of you seen him recently?”

Logan raised his left hand to his chin. “I believe the last time I spoke with him was thirteen days ago,” he answered as he crossed his arms. “He looked tired, but no more so than when he has an idea and stays up a day or so working on it. The last correspondence I had was when I sent him a memo detailing the aborted surprise party and subsequent low-key gift exchange. He simply returned the unopened letter with the word 'NO' written in red ink. That was six days ago.” He paused before sighing. “At the time, I just assumed he was being more exhausting than normal.”

“It was maybe a week for me,” Patton replied. His hands had dropped to his sides. Worry seemed to overtake his entire being. Virgil's heart broke at the sight. “He had missed two movie nights, so I went to his room. It was messier than normal, but not bad. I went up to his bedroom and knocked...” tears stared to flow. “He said he was fine,” he said through a choked sob. “That he had been busy and he was sorry. He promised to come to the next one. I should have... I... I should have...”

“Patton,” Thomas said, calm but firm with his hand raised towards the trembling father figure. “It's okay. We're gonna fix this. Okay?” Patton nodded in return.

Thomas looked toward the TV. “Roman?” he called. Nothing happened. Thomas shifted his feet. “Roman,” he said louder and with more authority. Again nothing. “Guys...” he said looking towards the others. “It's not working.”

The sides looked at each other hoping for answers, but it was Logan who spoke. “Thomas...” he said tapping his chin. “When was the last time you created anything?”

Thomas paused to think before pulling out his phone. “Five days ago,” he replied. “I posted a short.”

“How do you feel about it?” Logan continued.

Thomas gave him a puzzled look. “It's just a video,” he said. “It's not really good or bad, but it did get my average number of likes.”

“And how long since you have seen a handsome young man?” Logan asked in a way far more serious than the question seemed to warrant.

“Um...” Thomas said, quickly blinking like he just had cold water thrown in his face. “I have no idea, but I haven't left the house in days, so-”

“Not even in your dreams?” Logan asked, cutting Thomas off.

“No...” Thomas replied. “Actually, I haven't dreamed in a while either.”

Logan adjusted his glasses as the others exchanged knowing glances. He raised his left hand. “No creativity, no ego, no dreams, and no acknowledgment of those within the perimeters of your normal attraction,” he stated as he gestured with each point. “You are currently without Roman's influence.”

“He's cut off,” Virgil said. His eyes were wide, but his voice was quiet and calm.

“Like you were?” Patton asked Virgil, his eyes pleading.

Virgil shook his head, trying not to see Patton deflate. “No...” he said. “With me I cut myself off, but this... it's like his room isn't even there.”

Logan closed his eyes as if searching for it himself. When they opened again, they were filled with rage. He pushed a breath hard and fast past his lips like he was trying to blow out a room full of candles. “It's still there,” he said, “but his entire room has been blocked off, keeping any energy from escaping and getting to Thomas. Roman is most likely sealed inside.”

“Well,” Virgil said. His crooked smile took on a menacing tone as he stood to his full height, “looks like we have to go get him then.”

“Do you need me to take you there?” Thomas asked.

The three sides stood still for a moment as each tried to sink down to Roman's room. Nothing happened.

“Sorry kiddo,” Patton replied. “We can't get in without you.” His sad frown turned up at the corners with a bit of mischief. “Whoever put up the barrier must have used a pat-lock.”

Logan groaned. “Must you do that even now?” he said.

Patton shrugged. “What can I say? I can never key-p a good pun to myself.”

Virgil couldn't help but smile at Patton. Even though he was worried about Roman, he was still trying to lighten the mood. He was always looking out for them.

Virgil looked over at Thomas. He could feel the anxiety buzzing inside him just out of sight. “You ready for this?” he asked.

Thomas took a deep breath and blew it out slowly. “Yeah,” he said. “Let's go save Roman.” Thomas brought his fingertips to his temples. “Picturing my fantasies and wildest dreams.”

“I'm getting a migraine already,” Logan mumbled as they began to sink down.

“Padre's coming for ya kiddo!” Patton said with a shout.

“You better be okay Princey,” Virgil said to himself. He closed his eyes as they hit the dark space between. “Please be okay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thank you to my wonderful beta reader Sarah. You rock girl!
> 
> And thank you to my readers. Every kudos and comment means the world to me. ^_^
> 
> I also have a Tumblr, so if anybody would like to message me or read the chapters on there, you can find me @jamiebluewind
> 
> Fun Fact: This chapter title is from a popular quote originally said by Patrick Henry. The part that really reflected this chapter (and thus the reason I used it) is "We are not weak if we make a proper use of those means which the God of Nature has placed in our power... the battle, sir, is not to the strong alone it is to the vigilant, the active, the brave."


	4. Chapter 4: Kept In The Dark

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Virgil’s perspective
> 
> Chapter Warnings: angst, extreme self esteem issues, negative self talk and other cognitive distortions, panic attack, cursing, vomiting, blood mention, and a bit of aphasia (please comment if I missed any). Please go into this chapter prepared and stay safe

Roman's room was in chaos. The stagnant air was thick with doubt and self loathing. Papers littered the floor. The walls were covered in self deprecating statements. 'USELESS' was painted in large red letters staining Roman's prized Disney posters. 'HACK' covered the wall over the TV. 'SELFISH' was splashed across the blinds, the red paint dripping down them like fresh blood. The red marks were everywhere and contrasted with a sickening yellow light that filled the room. It made Virgil feel sick.

Virgil glanced over at the others. The effects of the room were already hitting them hard. Tears were streaking down Patton's face as he hugged himself. An occasional silent scream wracked his body. Logan stood stiff with his eyes wide in shock and arms glued to his sides. His eyes darted back and forth as he kept trying to talk, but the room seemed to snatch away part of every word he said, making communication impossible. As bad as they were, Thomas seemed to be hit the hardest. He had fallen to his knees, shaking and crying as he gulped for air.

“Thomas!” Virgil called out. Thomas didn't respond. Virgil could feel the anxiety building up in him and see the panic in his eyes. Roman's room was overwhelming Thomas with negativity, pushing him closer and closer to an attack. Virgil rushed over and knelt in front of him. He ignored the sickness that only seemed to get worse the further he got from his corner.

“Breathe Thomas,” he said as calmly as he could. “You can do it. In for four seconds.” A shaky breath followed as Thomas gasped for air. “Hold for seven seconds.” Thomas struggled, but held on. “Out for eight seconds.” The air exploded from Thomas' lungs. “Keep it up. You're doing good.”

As Thomas breathed, Virgil pulled all the darkness he could out of Thomas and into himself. It wasn't much. The dark emotions that were hitting Thomas the hardest weren't from him. He had to get Thomas stable enough to get the others out of here before things got worse.

“Thomas,” Virgil said as he placed his hands on Thomas' shoulders. “I need you to concentrate. I want you to focus on bringing your mind back to the real world and take Logan and Patton with you.”

A distressed look flashed across Thomas' face as he shook his head. Virgil took a breath. “Thomas, look at them. They need you.”

“But... Roman...” Thomas managed to get out.

“It's okay,” Virgil replied with a smirk. “I know darkness. I can handle being here. You can't. You save them and I'll go talk some sense into Sir Sing-A-Lot.”

Thomas nodded. Virgil felt his eyes on him. They were determined and said everything Thomas couldn't currently put into words. Thomas believed in him and Virgil wasn't about to prove him wrong.

Thomas pulled away and closed his eyes. Within seconds, he and the others were sinking down.

Virgil released the breath he had been holding and closed his eyes. He had somehow been able to hide his voice distortion until Thomas was gone, but now it was there in full force. He felt like hell, but Thomas didn't need to know that.

He opened his eyes and scanned the room again. He had been so caught up in the words on the walls and the state of his friends that he hadn't really looked for Roman yet. He felt his stomach twist with guilt as the room tried to run with the feeling, but Virgil wouldn't allow it.

Coming up empty in the main room, Virgil started towards the stairs to check the second floor. When he reached his usual place at the stairs, he froze. Unlike the rest of the room that was covered in giant bold red lettering, the wall beside him had a list written in shaky writing. “Bully, Cruel, Abhorrent, Stupid, Alone, Unfit, Disdained, Unlovable,...” The list went on and on. Virgil was shaking. His fingertips ghosted across the words. “Is this what you think of me?” Virgil whispered.

He turned away from the wall. He felt the pain rise in his chest as he grabbed the railing to steady himself. However, when he was greeted by the other words, something clicked. “My god Princey,” he said, his eyes wide in shock. “You should have told us.” He wanted to find Roman and shake him. Tell him that Patton didn't think he was selfish. That Logan didn't think he was pointless. That he didn't think... that he didn't...

Virgil whipped his body around to stare at the list again. “Oh god,” Virgil whispered. “No... Roman. No.” The pain in his chest was replaced with a new one along with the strong desire to claw the words out of existence with his bare hands. His hands balled into fists. He finally understood why Patton always threatened to physically fight him when he talked bad about himself.

Virgil searched each of the rooms upstairs. The layout was different from Thomas' house. The entire area was much larger. It didn't make sense logically, but in the realm of creativity, anything was possible. Some of the doors were already being affected by the darkness. Some were rusted shut. Others were boarded over. Virgil settled on opening the ones he could first. He could always go back and try the others later.

One room was a massive armory. Another contained orbs suspended in space with each one containing a different imaginary world. A third was just shelves filled to the ceiling with jars upon jars of Crofter's in every flavor imaginable. That one made Virgil snort. Leave it to Roman to have a jelly room.

With each room, Virgil felt his determination grow stronger. He walked with purpose. His body was a tight coiled spring ready to act. His oversized clothes and thin frame hid the long, lean muscle of a long-distance runner. He was a lot more powerful than he looked. He was made to protect the people he cared about and damn it he was going to save that idiot from himself even if he had to punch the darkness out of him!

After dozens of rooms, Virgil stood in front of what he assumed was Roman's bedroom. The door was warped and the bottom half looked badly water damaged. The white was faded to a dirty yellow. The gold had mostly chipped away, leaving behind shadows of where it once was. The frame was faded to a light pink and covered in cracks. Virgil touched the knob and felt a terrible weight pressing down on him. He jerked his hand back and stared, before reaching for the knob again. The feeling returned. Roman was here. He pushed past the discomfort to try and open the door. It refused to budge.

“Roman!” Virgil yelled as he banged on the door. “Come on man, let me in!” Silence. “Okay Romano, you asked for it!”

Virgil backed up and centered himself. With all his force, he drove his right heel into the carpet and kicked the door with his left foot. He landed a solid blow beside the doorknob and heard a satisfying crack. He repositioned himself for a second kick. Another crack, but the door still stood. “Fuck!” Virgil spat as he prepared for a third kick. He screamed, determined to get inside if it took a thousand more. Another crack. The wood splinted. And the door opened.

Virgil rushed in, but was immediately struck by swirling negative thoughts and a weight that pressed down on him so hard that it was hard to move. He put his hand on his knee to steady himself before he continued inside to look for Roman.

The bedroom looked even worse than the main area. The walls, ceiling, and even a small patch of visible carpet by his feet were covered in so many negative words and phrases that they were almost pure red. Water dripped down the walls and was soaked up by a deep layer of shredded papers that came past Virgil's ankles. Every mirror was cracked. Every piece of furniture was destroyed. And there, sitting in the middle of it all, was Roman.

Virgil made his way towards the shaking prince. He sat curled in a tight ball with his head resting on his knees. Bruises and cuts littered his body. His sash and shoes were missing. His golden accents looked like they had been ripped off. His shirt and pants were yellowed with age and stained red in places. Virgil silently hoped that it was paint and not blood.

Virgil knelt down in front of Roman and smiled as he ignored the pressure and his nausea. “Sup?” he said. His voice was distorted, but he tried to play it off as nothing as best as he could.

Roman slowly raised his head and looked at Virgil. His eyes were tired and bloodshot and he seemed to have trouble focusing. His face was wet with tears, but he didn't try to brush them away.

Virgil raised an eyebrow and tried to act normal despite the twisting feeling inside him. “Where's your manors Princey?” he said. “You forgotten how to greet a friend?”

Roman opened his mouth to say something, but closed it. He blinked several times before whispering, “You need to leave.” A black mist as dark as tar slipped past his lips as he spoke.

Virgil's eyes widened at the sight before finding his composure. “Nope,” he said popping the P as he reclined back, trying to get comfortable on the wet paper covered floor. “You can't get rid of me that easily.”

“Please,” Roman whispered as more black mist slip past his lips. He looked utterly defeated.

Virgil shook his head. “I'd rather hang out with you even if you are currently trying to out emo me,” he said with a smile.

Roman looked away. “I belong here,” he said. “I can't do anything right. I'm no good. Everybody hates me. I'm... I'm useless. Can't you see that?” Most black mist poured out making the air feel heavier than before.

Every word Roman said cut Virgil to the core. He never even considered that one of the others had to deal with dark thoughts too. He just assumed the worst of it fell on his shoulders, but now he realized Roman had it just as bad, only he had been facing it all alone.

Virgil took a breath to clear his head. He tried to remember how the others had helped him. He tentatively reached out his hand and placed it on Roman's shoulder. He looked Roman in the eyes and held them there despite his unease. “I'm gonna go with falsehood on that one,” he said. He tried to put confidence in his words.

Roman looked away. Virgil kept going still staring at the other side. “The things you create and the ideas you have are amazing. Because of you, Thomas has been able to help so many people and do something that makes him happy. You aren't perfect, but who the fuck is?! Not me, that's for sure.” Roman turned his head back towards Virgil with pain in his eyes. Virgil sighed. “And as far as everybody hating you? That's not true either because I like you a whole hell of a lot. I mean, I don't kick down doors for just anybody ya know?”

Roman stared at Virgil for a moment before the tiniest smile started to form. Roman parted his lips like he was about to speak, but before he could say anything, he winced and grabbed the side of his head.

“Roman!” Virgil shouted, his voice laced with fear. “Roman what's wrong?!”

Roman stumbled to his feet and tried to get away from Virgil before he doubled over and screamed. More black mist poured from his mouth. More negative words scrawled themselves across the room, covering broken furniture and random torn pages in red. Virgil ran over to his side as Roman shook with a new wave of tears. “Leave...,” Roman said choking through tears. “Now!”

Virgil felt his body shaking as his brain searched for something he could do to help his friend. Patton would extinguish it with kindness, love, and understanding. Logan would use logic to cut through the distortions. But Virgil? He was adrenaline and anxiety and protection and none of those things could help him right now.

That's when it hit him. He could pull the negativity into himself and take it to his room to be destroyed. It was made to process negativity. It would be difficult and painful getting it there, but he was willing to try anything. “I'm sorry Roman,” he said as he approached the shaking side. A bit of guilt twisted inside him. “I have to do this if you're gonna get any better.”

Before Roman could react, Virgil grabbed him, covered his mouth with his own, and inhaled. Something thick, foul, and sour flooded his mouth. His body tried to reject it, but he refused. He kept pulling through the pain. Roman had gone stiff in his grasp, unable to move as the darkness that had built up for far too long started to drain out of him. It was a blessing because it was taking all Virgil's concentration to keep going.

The room started shifting. The red paint started to fade. The torn pages moved across the floor towards one another as they repaired themselves. The crushing weight lessened.

The moment Virgil pulled out the last of the self hatred, he let Roman go and stepped back. Virgil widened his stance as he fought the convulsions in his stomach. His body couldn't process the thick loathing that swirled inside him, but he had to check on Roman before sinking out. He focused all his willpower on not throwing up before looking at Roman.

Roman was looking better already despite his pale and drained complexion. Virgil sighed. “I'm sorry I couldn't warn you about that,” Virgil said. He looked away unable to look the prince in the eyes. “Had to be a surprise or it might not have- OOF!”

Virgil was cut off by the embrace of an overly enthusiastic prince. His stomach churned from the impact as Roman buried his face in the fabric of his hoodie. “I... I don't... how... I was so...”

“It's okay,” Virgil said softly as he slowly raised his arms to return the hug. “I know. I'm just glad you're okay.” Virgil rubbed soft circles in the crying side's back. Another stomach convulsion reminded him that he was running out of time. “Listen,” he said as he broke the embrace. “You need to let the others know you're okay, but after that you need to rest.”  
Roman looked back at him with worry etched on his face. He clinched his jaw and nodded.

Virgil backed away with a smile. “See ya later Master Mixtape” he said bringing two fingers to his temple in a mock salute before sinking to his room.

\---  
Virgil broke out in a run towards his bathroom, barely making it to the toilet in time. His stomach convulsed as the pungent black sludge erupted from his mouth. The smell made it even worse than when it had gone down. His abdomen jerked in again and again. Tears ran down his face. Everything hurt as his body tried to get rid of every drop of the toxic sludge. He flushed after every episode to try and reduce the smell.

Once it was gone, his body didn't stop. The rancid lingering smell and disgusting taste in his mouth kept the convulsions going for what felt like forever. After a while of bringing up nothing but bile and dry heaving, it stopped. He braced himself and pushed to bring himself to his feet. His legs felt like jello, but he could still walk. He made his way to the sink to rinse his mouth out before grabbing his toothbrush.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to my wonderful beta readers Sarah and crystrifoglio for catching my mistakes and suggesting tags. You are both amazing! 
> 
> And thank you to my readers. Every kudos and comment means the world to me. And sorry for being a few days late. I've been sick.
> 
> I also have a Tumblr, so if anybody would like to message me or read the chapters on there, you can find me @jamiebluewind
> 
> Fun Fact: The title of Chapter 4 is from the song Bring Me To Life from Evanescence


	5. Chapter 5: Know Who Really Cares

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Roman’s perspective  
> Chapter Warnings: none I can think of (please message me if I missed any)

The others didn’t react how Roman expected. He had popped up with his head down expecting them to be mad or at least upset with him. When he looked up, they all stared at him in shock. He raised his hand to speak, but was cut off when Patton let out a strangled cry and ran towards him, wrapping him in a tight hug. Patton shook with heavy sobs as Roman supported the smaller man. “Shhhh,” Roman whispered softly as he ran his fingers through the back of his hair. “It’s okay padre.”

That was all it took for the other two to lose their composure. Tears ran freely down Thomas’ face as he smiled at Roman. Logan looked away to blink away tears that were trying to form.

“We were…” Patton started as another sob broke free. “We were so sc… ah… ared.” He cried loudly into Roman’s ruined tunic, holding onto him like his life depended on it.

Roman choked back his own tears. “I’m sorry I worried you,” he said before looking toward the others. His throat felt raw. “All of you. I didn’t mean…” he sighed. “I’m so sorry.”

“No,” Thomas said. His voice was stern. His red eyes were full of resolve. Roman flinched, expecting the worst. “You have nothing to apologize for. None of this was your fault.” Roman looked at Thomas with shock and confusion in his eyes, unable to respond. “You were hurting and needed help. I was hurting you because I was too stubborn to get help for my low self esteem. I’m sorry Roman.”

“Thomas…” Roman replied as he blinked tears away. “It’s not you. None of this is you. It’s my job to fight for your dreams and make you happy… and I failed.”

“Falsehood,” Logan stated as a matter of fact. Everyone turned to look at Logan whose eyes were locked on Roman. He adjusted his glasses. “To have failed, you would’ve had to been given a set number of tasks that could reasonably be completed by you in a specific time-frame and then not complete those tasks. On top of your many functions, you encompass Thomas’ ego and self esteem. As we are all aware, Thomas suffers from low self esteem which would result in a negative impact on Roman, just as periods of high anxiety can negatively affect Virgil. However, while Thomas has been working with Virgil to better understand and control his anxiety, he has been actively ignoring his issues with his own self-worth. By doing this, negativity continued to slowly build in Roman as the volume he was presented with was outside of what he could reasonably process on his own. It was only a matter of time until Roman became overwhelmed and Thomas was hit with the bottled-up emotion. Ergo, you did not fail. You simply became overwhelmed and then negated to inform us that you required assistance.”

The only sounds in the room came from Patton as he sobbed into Roman’s tunic. In the silence, the others were able to hear the soft whispers of gratitude and praise between sobs. Roman looked down at him fondly and started shifting his weight from foot to foot, gently rocking the emotional man in his arms.

Thomas cleared his throat, catching Roman’s attention. “He’s right ya know?” he said. “I should have been working on all my issues, not just my anxiety.” He smiled at Roman. “But don’t worry. We’ll figure this all out together.”

“Thank you Thomas,” Roman replied warmly with a nod. “I would like that.”

“Speaking of figuring out,” Logan interrupted. “I highly suggest Thomas take a break from work for five to seven days in order to improve his mental health and recharge. During this time, he can attempt to acquire professional help and research helpful techniques from credible online resources.”

“That’s actually a good idea,” Thomas said with a nod. “But wait… what do I tell Joan and Talyn?”

“You called?” said Deceit appearing in Patton’s unoccupied spot.

“Gah!” Thomas yelled. “What are you doing here!?”

“Isn’t it not obvious?” Deceit replied quirking his eyebrow.

“Uh, no!” Thomas replied.

Deceit sighed as he inspected his gloves. “You need to tell your enemies what’s going on, but you don’t want to tell them everything. I’m here to not help with that.”

“Ah,” replied Logan. “I request to review the finished lie of omission for errors.”

“Logan!” Thomas yelled. “Stop encouraging the slimy boy!”

Logan adjusted his glasses. “Thomas. I’ve told you before. As far as I know, his scales do not excrete slime.”

“Not the point,” Thomas replied with a huff. “Logan… I don’t want to lie to my friends.”

“Thomas…” Roman said quietly as he rocked Patton who was still too lost in his emotions to notice his spot being taken. “I don’t like him either, but I don’t think your friends need to know all the details about what happened.”

“Agreed,” Logan said with his arms crossed. “Deceit is also your self-preservation. He is the best suited out of all of us to discern which parts of recent events should be omitted without affecting the major points you wish to covey.”

“What she said,” Deceit said, pointing his thumb towards Logan. Logan scrunched his nose in response. “I’m gonna stay and work on that,” he said as he sunk out.

Thomas breathed in and out trying to calm himself before looking back at Roman. “How’s Virgil?” he asked. “I noticed he’s not here.”

Patton seemed to perk up at the mention of Virgil’s name. He lifted his head to look towards the stairs before looking back up at Roman. “Wha… eh… ere is he?” Patton asked. “Is he okay?”

Roman felt his heart break. It had been a long time since Patton had been this upset. “Yes,” Roman said with a kind smile. “He was a little worn out, so he went back to his room for a long nap, but not before making me promise to check in with all of you before I go to bed.”

Patton sniffled, rubbing his nose with a conjured tissue. “Good,” he said with a smile and a nod. “That’s good. I’ll get started on some soup and bring you both some in a few hours.”

Roman’s smile brightened. “That sounds splendid padre,” he replied with a reassuring squeeze to Patton’s shoulder. “I’ll leave the door to my guest room open. My bedroom is currently… in need of repairs.” Roman grimaced slightly as the others nodded in understanding.

“Well,” Roman said raising an eyebrow, “I best get to bed before I get in trouble with Mr. tall, snark, and handsome.” He gestured toward Virgil’s normal spot with a warm expression on his face.

Patton slowly stepped back to give Roman enough room. With a pose and a smile, Roman sunk down. He hoped they knew his smile was real.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to my wonderful beta readers Sarah and crystrifoglio for catching my mistakes. You are both amazing! 
> 
> And thank you to my readers. Every kudos and comment means the world to me.
> 
> I also have a Tumblr, so if anybody would like to message me or read the chapters on there, you can find me @jamiebluewind
> 
> Fun Fact: The title of this chapter is part of a quote from Beyonce Knowles. "When you love and accept yourself, when you know who really cares about you, and when you learn from your mistakes, then you stop caring about what people who don't know you think."


	6. Chapter 6: Voices In My Head

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Roman’s perspective  
> Chapter Warnings: none that I know of (please message me if I missed any)

Roman fell into the soft bed expecting to sleep a week. Instead, his eyes were barely closed an hour before he jerked awake. He couldn’t remember what the nightmare had been about, but whatever it was made him reluctant to go back to sleep. Instead, he tried to relax so his room could work its magic. His energy would return to normal faster if he was asleep, but as long as he wasn’t creating or brainstorming, his room would work to get him back to normal.

He put his arms behind his head and closed his eyes to try and get lost in a daydream, but the same images kept popping up. Virgil who broke down his door to rescue him. Virgil full of sarcasm and crooked smiles reaching out to him to try and pull him out of his dark thoughts. Virgil who put himself in danger to take away his pain and torment.

He had grown quite fond of the anxious side over the past few months. He always had Thomas’ best interests at heart, even when everyone had demonized him, including Thomas himself. He learned how to do his own makeup and had gotten quite skilled at it. He was even quite creative and artistic in his own right, which Roman admired and respected.

However, Roman had been so caught up in hating himself for months that he never realized Virgil had started to care about him as well. He could only imagine what Virgil went through to save him. He must have been so scared and overwhelmed, but on the outside he was his normal snarky self. He was kind and caring and more infuriatingly determined than Roman had ever seen him.

After Virgil took on all of Roman’s negativity, he had been shaking and so pale that it scared Roman. When he started apologizing for not asking first, Roman broke down. His arms were around the other before he could think. He wanted to tell him how grateful he was, that he had been so lost and full of pain, that he was his hero, but words had failed him. What could he say to the man who had gone through hell to save him and didn’t ask for anything in return? What could he say to someone who could barely stand, but wouldn’t leave until he was certain he was okay? Even Roman didn’t have the words.

A thought occurred to him. Actions do tend to speak louder than words, so perhaps he could do something for Virgil. But what? He really couldn’t create anything spectacular until more of his energy returned and it would be best for Thomas if he waited until he built up a proper energy reserve.

He cracked open his eyes and looked at his hand. While it was still a couple shades lighter than normal, his skin was almost back to its normal color. He felt better than he had in days.

The image of Virgil looking so weak and pale flashed before his eyes again. He blinked it away and immediately felt guilty. He shouldn’t be feeling better while Virgil was off in his room suffering because of him.

Before Roman could think, he was on his feet. Something flared up inside him. If Virgil took on all his bad energy, then damn it he deserved some of his good energy too! He concentrated on Virgil and sunk down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to my wonderful beta readers Sarah and crystrifoglio for catching my mistakes. You are both amazing!
> 
> And thank you to my readers. Every kudos and comment means the world to me.
> 
> I also have a Tumblr, so if anybody would like to message me or read the chapters on there, you can find me @jamiebluewind
> 
> Fun Fact: The title of this chapter is the title of a song from the musical Be More Chill.


	7. Chapter 7: Ever As Before

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Virgil’s perspective  
> Chapter Warnings: the opposite of angst (please message me if I missed any)

Virgil was sleeping soundly. He had been so exhausted after getting rid of all that… gunk that he fell asleep on the first soft surface he landed on. That surface just happened to be the living room couch.

He had no idea how long he enjoyed his dreamless sleep, but something pulled him out of it. His eyes fluttered open. He glanced around to get his bearings, only to spot Roman staring at him from his usual spot in front of the TV. He was barefoot and dressed in red and gold pajamas. The bruises and cuts were already starting to fade. Virgil was happy to see him looking more like himself.

As the fog of sleep lifted, he realized how weird this was. “Uh… Roman?” he said as he raised an eyebrow. “Do I even wanna know how long you’ve been watching me sleep?”

Roman cleared his throat. “I just got here and… you looked so peaceful,” he said as he raised his hand almost pleading. “I didn’t want to wake you.”

Virgil yawned and stretched. The nap had helped some, but it wasn’t enough. It was good to see Roman was feeling better, but he would probably pass back out as soon as he left. The kitten plush he had used as a pillow was calling his name. “As long as you don’t make it a habit,” he said as he stood up and stretched again. “Guess I’ve woken up worse ways.”

Roman nodded. “Good to know,” he said.

Virgil walked toward him. “You’re looking better,” he said, smiling. He automatically moved his hand to cover it, but paused halfway and lowered it back down. Roman smiled back. It seemed genuine.

“Thank you,” Roman replied as he closed the distance between them. From this close, Virgil could see his eyes were once again clear and filled with life and emotion. “I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for a daring rescue from my very own dark knight.” Roman smiled broadly as his eyes grew misty. “You are my hero Virgil.”

Virgil froze, his mouth open in shock as he blinked rapidly trying to process what Roman had just said. He raised his left hand to rub the back of his neck. “Um…” Virgil said as his eyes darted around the room. “Thank you?” He lowered his hand. “I’m sure the others would have done the same. I was just the only one fucked up enough to do it. I’m just glad you’re okay or whatever.”

Roman’s eyes softened. “I want to do something for you as a thank you,” Roman said.

Virgil raised an eyebrow. “Seriously Roman. You don’t have to-”

“Nonsense!” Roman shouted as he interrupted Virgil. “I am going to help you recover and since you took away my bad energy, it’s only fitting that I give you some of my good as well.”

“Whoa, whoa whoa,” Virgil said, holding up both his palms towards Roman. Any thoughts of sleep were thrown out the window. “Pump the breaks Princey. You’re gonna do what now?”

Roman put one hand on his hip as he gestured with the other. “Why, I’m going to give you some of my good energy,” he said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. “That way, you can get back to normal much sooner.” Roman was practically beaming. Beaming!

“Nah,” Virgil said, waving his hand. “I’m good. I can rock the goth look for a while.”

“Then I suppose that have no choice,” Roman said with a mischievous smile. “I shall make us even for not asking for my consent earlier!”

Before Virgil could think, Roman had closed the distance, pulled him close, and pressed his lips to his. Virgil felt warm embers that burst into fire. It made every muscle relax in his body. His eyes fluttered close. It was like all of Roman’s energy was focused in his lips.

Virgil was lost in the feeling until he realized that some of Roman’s energy was seeping through. He concentrated his own energy to his mouth to repel Roman’s energy. He expected Roman to feel disgusted. That he would let go and back away. What he didn’t expect was Roman’s body going slightly limp as he parted his lips and moaned.

That was all it took for Virgil to lose control. The normally cautious side raised his hand to cradle Roman’s head as he tipped his own to the side. His tongue slipped past Roman’s parted lips and into his mouth. Roman tasted like peaches and hot cinnamon. Virgil let his own cool energy flow into his tongue as it explored Roman’s mouth. More moans escaped the prince’s lips, spurring Virgil on. His fingers fisted in Roman’s hair.

Virgil felt Roman’s hand glide down and slip under the back of his shirt. A hand found the small of his back and pulled him closer. It was a strong, almost protective embrace.

Virgil withdrew his tongue from Roman’s mouth, only for Roman’s to follow behind. His tongue left streaks of fire where it touched. Virgil’s eyes shot open before he melted back into the kiss. A sound bubbled up in his throat. He let go and allowed the moan to escape his lips.

Virgil felt weak and powerful at the same time. He wanted to stop and catch his breath. He wanted it to go on forever. His lips and mouth felt like they were on fire. His heart was beating so fast he thought it would break free of his chest. And he loved it.

Virgil let his right hand slip under Roman’s shirt to feel the soft skin and powerful muscles hidden underneath. His hand rested on Roman’s side as he absentmindedly traced small circles with his thumb.

They broke apart, each leaning on the other for support. Their foreheads pressed together as they tried to catch their breath.

Virgil smirked. “Told you,” he said, out of breath, “I didn’t need it.”

Roman raised his head. “I suppose,” he said planting a soft kiss on the right corner of Virgil’s mouth, “I’ll just have to,” another kiss on the left, “kiss you without it.”

Virgil smiled and leaned into the kiss. It was softer than the first. Roman’s energy was still there, but it was less intense. It was like the warmth from sunshine hitting bare skin. It felt relaxing and… safe. He didn’t know why it felt so good or what the feelings were that seemed to be bubbling up inside him, but he didn’t give a damn. Right now, there was this and that was okay.

When the kiss ended, Virgil opened his eyes to see soft brown eyes staring back. Roman looked so peaceful and happy, like he didn’t have a care in the world. As Virgil gazed at the impulsive, brave man standing in front of him, he silently wondered if he could pull a muscle from smiling too much.

Virgil sighed and placed his left hand on Roman’s cheek. He slowly rubbed his thumb back and forth under the dusting of eye shadow that was starting to form. “My room is starting to affect you,” he said gently.

“I know,” Roman replied without backing away.

Virgil held his gaze. “You need to get back to your room,” he said. “Recharge a bit.”

“Only if I can come back,” Roman replied as he dipped his head and raised his eyebrows.

Virgil snorted. “Seriously?” he said sarcastically as he shook his head. “You’re kinda stuck with me now.”

Roman knit his brows together. “Any clue what this is?” he asked.

“No,” Virgil answered. “You?”

Roman reached out his left hand and laced it with Virgil’s right. “Not a clue,” he said, “and I couldn’t care less.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to my wonderful beta readers Sarah and crystrifoglio for catching my mistakes and being so patent with me as I finished my story. I adore you both ^_^
> 
> And thank you to my readers. I loved reading your comments and smiled at your kudos. I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it. If you ever want to say hello, you can find me on Tumblr @jamiebluewind . I'm normally very responsive to messages. 
> 
> Fun Fact 1: The title of this chapter is a line from the song Beauty And The Beast from the movie of the same name.  
> Fun Fact 2: The major points in the story were foreshadowed in Chapter 1.  
> Fun Fact 3: The anxiety and low self esteem described in the story were very much influenced by my own experiences with both.  
> Fun Fact 4: The above scene was actually the hardest for me to write. I wanted it to feel very organic and in character.  
> Fun Fact 5: Virgil's energy was like mint and dark chocolate  
> Fun Fact 6: Several readers made some lovely art on Tumblr. You can find them under the "Reader Creations" page on my Tumblr or under #art from readers. I would link them here, but I'm having trouble doing it at the moment.  
> Fun Fact 7: Two of the things I wanted to accomplish with this fic was to show Virgil as the anxious vigilant protector he is in canon and to show Deceit as morally gray instead of evil incarnate.  
> Fun Fact 8: My best friends Noel and Sarah as well as Tumblr artists @crystrifoglio and @menacefh are the people who pushed me to share my work for the first time ever. Without them, this would've never been possible. They cheered me on and gave me the courage to put myself out there. I can't thank them enough.


End file.
